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| wow... what a crazy past month and a half its been. i went to mexico with the band. what an amazing time. most people that i know that have done trips to other countries talk about how awesome it is and say a lot of nice little cliche sayings about the trip. what i didnt realize, and didnt expect to realize, was that all of the "cliche" sayings just seem cliche because there really is no way to describe how fantastic the trips are. i found myself using a bunch of "cliche" sayings (like "a part of my heart is still there" and such...) because it was the easiest way to express how i felt about the trip. it was very eye-opening (there i go again....). and then there was choir tour. sure, it was only to south dakota and nebraska, but that was a lot of fun. i stayed with three great friends with host families, and it was a blast. it was so cool to be welcomed into a complete strangers home, and while sang in small churches for small audiences, it made for very intimate concerts, which was nice. on both tours, i really got to know my fellow band and choir members. that was probably my favorite part of touring this year. during easter break, i got to see Mute Math in concert. it was one of the most amazing things i have ever seen. and on top of that, i got to go with great people. also during easter break, i made some money, saw and hung out with my family, and experienced many other cool things. so while busy and not very relaxing at all, it was still really good. thats all for now. | | |
| in 4 days, i will be in mexico. i cant wait. i am so excited about this trip for so many reasons. on of the things that i have really learned since school started was love, both what love is, and how to love people. its easy enough to love people here at northwestern. but when i get down to mexico and i am helping in the soup kitchen or playing with poor children, it will be a wonderful chance to love people i have never had the chance to love before. sure, there are language and cultural and geopraphic barriers to cross, and there are parts of the trip that are going to suck, but for the first time in my life i will be pushed so far out of my comfort zone that all i can do in response depend on love. just being able to serve people is going to be wonderful. im excited for our concerts. im excited about playing with a professional orchestra. im excited about getting an expanded worldview. im excited about traveling with all 66 members of the band. im excited about what its going to be like when i get home and how what i will learn in mexico can be used here. im excited about flying. im excited about taking and sharing pictures. im excited about not taking a cd player or ipod on the trip since it will give me a reason to talk to whoever i sit next to on the bus and plane. im excited about getting out of iowa and experiencing something new. i cant wait. i have recently been hooked on the songs "come and listen" and "here is our king" by david crowder band. ive decided to cut out some bad stuff from my diet and replace it with good stuff-- like replacing soda with milk. its a lot easier then i thought it would be. and im sure if i was in shape, i would feel the difference. i need to start running again..... stupid cold weather. now is a very rough time to be a musician (well, i least i think so). there are so many good players out there right now that no matter how much progress i see myself making on whatever instrument i am playing, i always feel like im not good enough. and with bands like fall out boy making triple platinum albums that only use bar chords and simple chord progressions, i cant help but wonder if all the work it would take to consider myself good. and all the work ive already put in, is worth it. both view points dont do a whole lot for my self confidence. thats all for now. | | |
| In my last post, I talked about my grandfather passing away. Nine days later, my great-aunt, his sister-in-law, passed away as well. Ten days after carrying my grandfather's coffin to his grave, I was back at the cemetary again with my parents to watch as my aunt was buried ten feet away from grandpa. My family was just getting back on their feet when we were hit again by the passing of a close loved one. These past three weeks have been some of the hardest of my life. It's been a week since my aunt's funeral, but I am still exhausted physically, mentally, and emotionally from the past few weeks. I miss both of them so much. I still dont really know how to feel about all of this. Part of me wants to continue to mourn, to let all of this emotion take it's natural course, even if it does beat me down for a while. Part of me is frustrated because its been a while since the funerals and I still do not feel normal. Part of me wants to wake up tomorrow and not feel a thing about the last few weeks, while the other part feels that that would be a cold and heartless thing to do. My RD said that whatever I am feeling is what I am supposed to be feeling, and that is why I am feeling it. Do I feel confused and worn out and empty and stretchede thin because I am supposed to be feeling this way? How am I supposed to be feeling this way if I don't even know what I am feeling? Is it ok to be angry? Is it ok to be fed-up? To be tired? To be frustrated? Sad? Irritated? To want to crawl into bed and sleep for a day, a week, a month, until this all just goes away? What am I supposed to do about not knowing how to deal with not knowing what I feel about not knowing how to respond to a situation that not a lot of people have gone through? | | |
| My grandpa passed away on Saturday morning. He lived here in Orange City with grandma for 12 years, so the funeral is in Orange City. All of my dad's side of the family is up here for the funeral, which is tonight. The burial is Tuesday morning. This will be a hard time for my family, since my grandpa was the cornerstone of our family. Please keep us in your prayers. Thank you. Pete | | |
| "Personal wealth is distributed so unevenly across the world that the richest two per cent of adults own more than 50 per cent of the world's assets while the poorest half hold only 1 per cent of wealth." "Adults with more than $2,200 of assets were in the top half of the global wealth league table" "If all the world's wealth was distributed evenly, each person would have $20,500 of assets to use." "While North America has 6 per cent of the world's adult population, it accounts for 34 per cent of household wealth." and the kicker... "Debt is also low in poor countries because financial institutions do not exist to allow people to borrow." when you combine this with the fact that America is getting fatter, test scores in schools are going down, and that the average American doesnt have a clue about what going on in the world, the phrase "fat, stupid, lazy, selfish American" seems quite accurate and appropriate. what can you do to change this? what willl you do to change this? | | |
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